Most folks wake up peacefully
She abruptly wakes up shaking and nauseated
Sometimes dry heaving
Reaching for that magical pill to calm everything down
Will it work this morning?
She sits up in her bed waiting for the nerves to settle down
Careful not to fall back asleep
One hour goes by
The body settles down
Surviving another morning
Apprehensive
She struggles until the next dosage
*
*
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Life
Did not
Give me
Fancy
Dancy
Ripe fruit
Instead
I mostly tasted bitterness
Unable to recognize
This man
Eyes full of tears
*
*
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Walking
Talking
Skin
Bones
Weekly
Blood
Data
Transfusions
Soulless
Machines
This is the grand scheme
*
*
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glass
shatters
on tile floor
I
crunch down
my head into the pillow on the bed
heavy cry
competing
with strongest rain
coming
down
from a thunderous sky
*
*
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Slow Burn
Absorb the pain
Hobble along with my cane
soon
only ashes
*
*
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sitting
observing
candle burn to the end
I never understood
how much
hurt
decimates
nerves
*
*
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dark room
everyone gone
I turn off the switch to my mind
*
*
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days shorter
nights longer
methodically
excavate
deeper
into
my unexplored brain
*
*
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each day
another layer
of body rots away
teeth decay
positive
negative
charges
the
nervous system
wiring
in disarray
bottles of good whisky
only friends who stayed
my mind is still OK
*
*
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I run
fast
faster
not fast enough
nighttime dreams
continue
to
rattle
my
mind
*
*
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Engulfed by pain
Mummified
Shackled with chains
All walked away
Dinner plates
Fall
On
Kitchen floor
Four
Locks
Front & back doors
Ceiling fans
Covered with dust
Cockroaches
Feast
On
Moldy
Pie crust
*
*
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Depression
Swimming in a lake
The weeds strangle my body
Trying to break free
I’m only pulled down deeper
into the opaque water
*
*
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Desire=Suffering
Daily craving
Meditation
Listen to gong
1-2 hours long
Confused
Mind savors simple food
*
*
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mind’s web
accumulates past
calculates future
struggles
with
present
to
cooperate
*
*
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Hospital bed
Connected to IV drip
Urine half fills container
Days pass examining ceiling
Scheduled
Tests
Medication
Frustration
*
*
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park bench
silence
a man sat next to me and said
“all I have left is my mind
Can you hear the chimes?
that magnificent sound
is keeping me alive”
*
*
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Colors gone
All I see is grey
Nothing clear
I’m
Engulfed
In smoky haze
*
*
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Unable
To
Stop
Shaking
He
Takes his pills
Laboring
To make it through each day
*
*
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Morning
Feeling
Blue
Strolled
Outside
Took a long view
At
Laughing
Buddha
Now alright
*
*
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wick is lit
unable to quit
slow burn
emotions churn
wax melts
brain revolts
*
*
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Post-op
uncomfortable cold hospital bed
respecting the pain
organs do not like to be handled
*
*
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negativity in the mind
haul in hooks on a line
turn handle
slow grind
toss chum into abyss
only positive thoughts control process
*
*
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Expanding quicksand
Tight strings anxiety bell rings
Banging rusting pan
*
*
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Sit
Face wall
Feed
Chipper
Voyage to insignificant place
*
*
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Paranoia seeds
Tap Tap sucking sap from trees
Insects gorge on leaves
*
*
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Spraying glass cleaner
Wiping with a soft cloth
Mirror
Of
My
Mind
Spotless
Surf carving away rocks
Sun resting for the day
Alone on the beach
Time to leave
Folding towel
Walking away
No more negative thoughts
Sitting peacefully
Back straight facing the blank wall
My blood pressure falls
Working heavy bag
Stress drifts away from me like
Helium balloon
The executive
Was always top of his game
Then he lost his mind
The Hermit Poet's Ramblings 